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How AP world makes me feel

You, if you decide to take this devil of a class

AP World History is taught by Mr. Murphy, and the topics discussed will range from human sacrifice (very interesting) to why Murphy hates pugs (there's a lot of reasons). Many freshmen take this class instead of World History Honors. This is considered playing oneself, because it is not only nearly an APUSH level of work in your first year of actual high school, but it also denies one the experience of awesome OT lectures unless they elect to take AP HuG, and your college credits can easily be covered by taking easier AP social sciences over the next three years. But hey, the summer reading book is interesting.

Topics of Discussion Edit

  • Agriculture
  • T R A D E
  • Ancient Rome
  • Slavery
  • Reading the damn book
  • Why the European explorers that journeyed to the Americas were or weren't great and why that's subjective as hell, like most things (example that murphy used: was hitler good? No. Was he great? Depends on your definition of great.)
  • Pugs
  • Why Murphy hates pugs
  • Mongols
  • Movies (and their lack of historical accuracy)
  • why we should read the damn textbook
  • Something about Palma not remembering anything
  • Why women are superior to men (no they're not, both genders are equal due to each having some natural advantages that the other doesn't. oh yeah, and humanity can't survive without both for obvious reasons)
  • Why Murphy is surprised by the fact that women haven't risen up and rebelled, putting themselves in charge of the world ("Not like they could do any worse than we have." - Mr. Murphy)
  • *something sarcastic*
  • Why a YouTube video of Tickle Me Elmo burning is a good thing to watch
  • Feeding pugs to giraffes, then feeding the giraffes to sharks, who will then choke and die
  • How to make any movie better: Add 2 random explosions

What to Expect if You Take this Class Edit

  • Being told to read the damn book
  • The death of Elmo
  • Lots of work
  • Being told to read the damn book
  • Being called on if you don't talk much (he does this points thing)
  • Pop quizzes, because you didn't read the damn book.
  • Sleepless nights because you procrastinated
  • DBQs galore
  • CCOT
  • Dying inside if you haven't already
  • Compare and Contrast work
  • At least one lengthy off-topic discussion a week
  • Being called a "gerhert-a-ma-bob" when you perform a displeasing action
  • Terms and Questions
  • Relying on Quizlet for answers
  • Karl Marx = Communist Santa Clause
  • internal screaming

Human Sacrifice Edit

How to perform a human sacrifice, according to the Aztecs Edit

  1. Take your sacrifice to the top of an Aztec temple
  2. Make a major cut in their torso, just below the ribcage
  3. Put your arm into the sacrifice's torso and feel around for the heart (You'll know when you find it because it's beating)
  4. Firmly grasp the heart
  5. Twist your hand like you're picking an apple
  6. Pull the heart out
  7. Show the heart to the victim sacrifice
  8. Burn the heart
  9. Rejoice, because the gods will give you a good harvest

Benefits of being a sacrifice Edit

  • if you volunteer you get everything you want for a whole year
  • you get to die (bonus: you won't have to do any more WHAP work)
  • unfortunately if you want to die enough they'll accept your desire as a sacrifice